Lord, I am feeling pretty discouraged and down this morning. It has been so nice to live inside a HOUSE for five days, out of the cold and snow and wet. It has been nice to leave my laptop out on the table, and make REAL progress on my goals. It has been awesome to use an oven and a stovetop, a microwave and a washer and dryer. And I have thoroughly enjoyed hanging out with my Mate where it is actually WARM, even watching silly old TV shows together on a couch. It has been even more AWESOME to not have to get in anyone’s way, since my Mate and I were the only ones AT the house, while my brother and sister-in-law have been away for the holiday. Now, I feel like a lesser human, preparing to move back into my little mini van where the best I can do is SURVIVE until my Mate finally gets his little motorhome roadworthy, with working lights and mirrors/backup cameras… and MAYBE we can finally start the trip down to Texas. But Lord, even with that I am SCARED, because I only have several hundred dollars left, to pay our bills and get anything else we need, for an indefinite amount of time. My Mate still has a little bit of cash, but he never ever knows HOW MUCH, and I certainly can’t count on having any of that, to pay our bills — which are mostly all MY bills anyways, for trying to keep this website and all my related dreams and goals afloat. I have been finding all kinds of potential jobs on Upwork and such… but without reliable internet/hotspot, there is literally NOTHING I can do to make money immediately. I thought maybe my book would sell, but I give away FREE copies instead, because I want people to be HELPED. I thought maybe we would be down in Texas by now, and perhaps I could get a little part-time job, but there’s no way I can get one up here, and have to TRY to drive in the snow and ice — especially since my Mate insists we will be able to leave ANY DAY NOW… for the last six weeks or so, lol. I really just want to pull my head in and hibernate — sleep — until it is time to LEAVE and go somewhere I can come OUT from under blankets again! Until then, it seems I am just using up air and water and food for nothing, Lord. What good am I, when I cannot do ANYTHING but SURVIVE?!